How much time do you spend lamenting the fact that you’re not where you should be, versus accepting and appreciating where you’re at?
For me, my thoughts tend to be skewed toward dwelling on where I think I should be, my shortcomings, things I’ve screwed up, things I wish that I’d done better, and so forth. Often, I subject myself to this exercise while completely ignoring everything good about what I am doing, where I’m at, things I’ve learned and improved on, and all the other things that are generally pretty okay.
If you can relate, you’re not alone. Self-doubt, feeling unsure of yourself and feeling afraid are 100% normal, human and okay. It’s vital to acknowledge these feelings and let them be there. But we can’t allow them to paralyze us. Beating yourself over the head is not an effective motivator. Repeatedly mourning that you’re not where you think you “should” be doesn’t move you closer to it. In fact, it’ll probably just make you feel stuck.
Does sorrow over where you’re at make you feel empowered to change, or does it make you feel like a victim of your circumstances? Does it make you feel present with life, or does it draw your attention away from the stuff that will contribute positively to your journey?
If you’ve lost some weight but you still have a lot more to lose, you’re doing amazing. I know the road is long and difficult, but just being on the road is a huge deal. You will get to where you want to be if you keep working at it. But you won’t if you give up because it’s not happening on some arbitrary timeline that you set for yourself.
If you’re trying to learn a new lift, set a PR, or get ridiculously ripped, but you have a lot of work ahead of you before you get there, you’re also doing amazing. Don’t discount how awesome it is to be where you’re at: learning, growing, improving and putting in a ton of work every day.
The same goes for little things, like crappy workouts. Instead of dwelling on how terrible you’re doing, meet yourself where you’re at. It sucks, but that’s okay. Do the best you can with what you’ve got on a given day, then move on. Full effort on your best day won’t look the same as full effort on your worst day, but they’re both full effort.
No matter your goal, this is a long journey. Try to accept each stage, because all of them are okay.